some people find someone they love and think
where have you been all this time
i don’t need to ask
you’ve been in my life for
weeks
months
years
im just wondering
why didn’t realize
that we could be something
until now

i think you feel it too
or at least i hope you do
every time i’m next to you
my soul swells and my heart radiates with brilliant hues of red and gold
so bright that you can probably see

your eyes
blue, green, gorgeous
the color of a shallow sea
yet i get lost deep inside them
and they set fire to my heart

i thought i was numb
dead and cold to the world of love
i thought i would never feel this again
i thought there was no one else left
why did i never think of you

you, who possesses whatever binding power my heart needs to become whole again
whole for real
beyond the facade of “healed” i’ve taken way too much time to slap together
out of band aids and copper wire and prescriptions
now you’re becoming the only drug i need

you, who makes me feel alive by just
walking next to me
even if you had to catch up to me first
caring about what i have to say
even if you didn’t catch it the first three times
complimenting my poetry
i bet you’d like this one too
but you don’t get to read it
not yet

and you’re funny
and you’re sweet
and you’re smart
and you’re patient
and im sure you have flaws
cracks and bumps in your surface
but i can’t see them
because i’m thinking about how smooth
your hand would be to hold

so many tiny moments
that probably mean nothing to you
replay in my head
where i subject them to endless scrutiny
i know im looking too far into
the way you tilt your body when we sit together
the way you glanced at me and smiled that once
the way you talk about your interests to me and let me talk about mine
the way you laugh when my jokes aren’t that funny
the way you’ve stopped flinching away when i reach out to touch you
someday i’ll reach out with my heart

god i wish i could know
what it’s like to hold you
you just look like you give great hugs
you certainly did in my dream last night
and in my dreams of the future
i dare you to prove it